What’s YOUR Pixie Dust?

My kids are all grown up now (gulp), so it’s been a while since I read Peter Pan, but I have to say:  I always loved the story.  The thought that you could sprinkle a little pixie dust on something and it would magically work, always intrigued me.

I thought about this the other day when I was on my way to lunch with Jake, one of my partners, because I swear that one of our supervisors has pixie dust.

Jake was wondering what it was that made it possible for this great supervisor, let’s call her Sue, to leverage her abilities so that multiple folks, working all at the same time on different assignments, always get their jobs done and done right.

While we were talking, I realized that Sue and her team could produce an incredible volume of work with really very little time involvement on Sue’s part.  Others, in her same position, have been unable to be this effective.  

So what’s the difference?

Pixie dust.

Sue sprinkles pixie dust on everything that she touches.  Just like Tinkerbelle leaves a trail of pixie dust behind her, Sue leaves a comment here, a compliment there, a suggestion here, and by spreading her pixie dust as she goes, her subordinates can fly.

Her ability to approach her team in ways that inspire them to get the job done is her pixie dust.

Dan Sullivan of The Strategic Coach coined the term “Unique Ability” many years ago to describe the one thing everyone has that allows them to be incredibly productive, energizing and impactful on the world around them.  

I write about Unique Ability in my book, Say Hello to the Elephants.

Well, now that I’m old and soft (except for my physique, which is now svelte like a rock star), I prefer to call this “pixie dust.” Emotionally, pixie dust is the phrase that really describes just how special your Unique Ability is.

I believe that we all have pixie dust. If you think about your day, where do you shine?  What can you do that produces superior results and impacts people in a way that others cannot replicate?

This is probably your pixie dust.  

I know that you have pixie dust, and you have to find it if you want to leverage that unique thing to make yourself happier and more prosperous.  

Successful people have identified what their pixie dust is and have used it to help them in their vocations.  

I have my own pixie dust, and it has helped me live a life that is magical.  Not to be cheesy (okay, I’m going to be cheesy), but pixie dust has allowed me to fly.

Pixie dust is your unique, intellectual capital. It represents the confluence of what you know and deploy in a way that others cannot.

So how do you find your pixie dust? Here’s step one…

Sit down where it is quiet and list all the things that you do.  Separate these things into four categories:

Things I do well.

Thinks I’m okay at.

Things I do very well...and...

OMG! I’m so good at this it would make your head explode!

That fourth column is where you will find 
your pixie dust.

If you need more help finding your pixie dust, check out the Unique Ability chapter in Say Hello to the Elephants.

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The Secret to Life...

Sandy Koufax

Before I start, let me issue a warning: If you aren’t a sports person, you might decide to skip this blog. But don’t. You are about to learn the secret to life.

Okay, now let me get started …

When I was a kid I dreamed of being a baseball player. As you may infer, that never happened. At least I get to write about it. (Small miracles, right?)

Well, I recently got to watch the moderated discussion between Joe Torre and Sandy Koufax on Fox Sports. Joe Torre is mainly known for coaching a second-rate team called the New York Yankees. Yeah, I said it. What you going to do about it?

Sandy Koufax, on the other hand, is known for many things. He pitched four no-hitters, including the eighth perfect game in baseball history. He had 2,396 strikeouts, won the Cy Young award four times, and, oh yeah, he was retired by 30.

Take that, Torre.

Sandy Koufax became something of an enigma. People thought he knew the secret to life, a personal philosophy that worked in his favor.

An interviewer asked him once who his biggest influence was. He said that it was his grandfather. He went on to say that his grandfather had a saying that he lived by.

And this is the secret to life, according to Sandy Koufax’s grandfather.

What was that saying?

Say no to drugs?

Live long and prosper?

I’ll be back?

No, no, and nope. (Great sayings, though).

The saying—his secret to life—was: “Be loose with your money and tight with your time.”

Imagine how cool it was to be Sandy Koufax. My grandfather never spit out wisdom like this. He mainly said things like “pass the peas” and “listen to your dad.”

“Be loose with your money and tight with your time.” Pretty cool.

So let’s talk about this “secret of life.”

We can all agree that time is finite, right? In our day-to-day lives and duties, time is finite for sure. We aren’t machines who can simply move faster to make more widgets.

We have no ability to stretch time. To make things last.

Therefore, we have to use our time well. If you work upwards of 12 hours a day, that’s a long time. Are you choosing the things you do with your time wisely? Are you working so that you can get out of the office faster, make more money, and provide value to your clients? Or are you constantly taking breaks to catch up on the Real Housewives of New Jersey, twitter, and Facebook?

(Love the real housewives, by the way … especially Theresa. She seems like a great cook.)

Now I’m not saying that everyone should be working every minute. Remember, I’m a huge fan of Ultradian breaks. In fact, I took a break between paragraph three and paragraph four.

Instead, I’m asking you to think about the moments you spend at your job and in your personal life. Are you making the very best use of your time? Or are you wasting an opportunity to be doing something better?

Are you getting the sleep you need? Are you spending quality time with the people you care about? Are you giving the people you work with 100 percent of your attention when needed? Or are you waiting for the next thing to happen, and not living in the moment?

Think about it. When you get really old like me (I’ve been 28 for the last number of years) and look back at the years, the stuff that you will regret the most is the time lost. You won’t regret the money you lost.

Time is our most valuable commodity. (Thank God it’s not being traded on the open market yet. I wouldn’t want time to be a part of our recession. How horrible would that be?)

I’ve been very fortunate in my life and would say that I’ve become pretty good with managing my time. I treat time with respect and try not to waste it. I joke about how much TV I watch and how lazy I am, but the truth is that I get a great deal of joy out of everything I do. Everything has a purpose for me, and this gives me a great deal of nourishment.

Can you say the same thing? And for those of you in your 20s, trust me when I say that you have no idea how little time it takes to get form 25 to 60 years old.

It goes by in a blink.

Today’s challenge: Consider adopting Sandy Koufax’s grandfather’s secret of life, if just for a day. Well, adopt at least part of it. Take the “loose with your money” part with a grain of salt. But “tight with time” … put that in the bank.

Do Ask - Don't Tell

 

I met a man at a marketing event named David Berkus. David Berkus has had a wonderful 40-year run as an owner and investor in companies. He claims a 97 percent return on his Angel investments. He is one of the founders of something called the Tech Coast Angels. He wrote a book, Berkonomics, about lessons he learned from investing in emerging companies, most of which have been very successful.

I devoured the book in one day.

One of the things he writes about in the book is how the customer is the teacher. He highlights the fact that customers know what they want from us; we do not know what is best for the customer. This is worth repeating: customers know more about what they want than we do.

So how do you find out what they want? Ask them! Ask them! Ask them!

You’d be surprised how many professionals don’t ask a customer what they want. They tell customers what they need. This should never happen. Professionals are supposed to be listeners. When you listen, you cannot help but exceed a customer’s expectations because you are smart enough and creative enough to hear what they want and imagine for them a bigger future than what they can imagine for themselves. I firmly believe this and believe that is why customers respond to my company, and why they will respond to yours.

There’s a quick process you can use when you are talking to customers. (By the way, they are customers or aspirants—not clients. In Old English, a client is was another word for a serf. Unless you also use words such as “me lady” and “doth” and “betwixt,” don’t use “client.” But I digress. My point is that customers are not your subordinates.)

But I digress again. Here is an effective process I recommend:

First, be sure you contract with the customer to set their expectations reasonably. A customer might want something more than what you can deliver. The time to be honest with them and set reasonable expectations is at the beginning. I have never known a customer that would not accept what they have been told can be reasonably done.

If you do encounter someone who doesn’t accept your professional estimations, they shouldn’t be your customer. For instance, if you design swimming pools and somebody who declares money is no object wants you to complete an Olympic sized pool with a wave machine, water slides, and talking animatronic dolphins in 24 hours, run, don’t walk, away from them. I’m no swimming pool expert, but I’d be willing to bet ten dollars it would take more than a day to build a swimming pool with these specifications.

“Money is no object” is certainly enticing, but before being seduced by such an offer, ask yourself: Is it worth the damage to me and my reputation when I am unable to complete a job I knew was impossible to begin with? It sounds like an awesome pool, but I’m guessing it would take at least two days to finish.  

Secondly, communicate expectations both verbally and in writing. After you have had a conversation, follow up in writing so you have the words down. Confirm what you have discussed with Mr. Smith in an email. Copy your immediate supervisor, whomever is supervising the job, or anyone else associated with the job. Be specific. If you are asked to do X, Y, Z be sure to inform the customer you can do X and Y in four days and Z on the fifth.

Sometimes even the smallest details can bring a project down if everyone is not on the same page. I am reminded of the epic rock band, Spinal Tap. For their show stopping song Stonehenge, they wanted a replica of the Stonehenge ruins on stage while they sang the song. The sketches of the original design included measurements in inches rather than feet. Consequently, when the pieces arrived the night of the concert, they barely rose to the musicians’ knees. This is hilarious, though the band wanted the effect to be dramatic.

Third, when conditions change—and they will—don’t assume the customer knows it. Tell them. Re-contract around expectations. In many ways, a business relationship is like a personal relationship. Customers liked to be talked to. They want to be paid attention to. Remind them what you had committed. Remind them about any changes in conditions and then re-set their expectations verbally as well as once again in writing:

“Dear Mr. Smith:

Your attorney did not send his legal rep letter in on time. As we discussed, this will push us back a week…”

Above all, communication is key. Legendary filmmaker Cecile B. DeMille would have attested to this in his day. DeMille was preparing an epic battle scene that had been rehearsed relentlessly. As the sun began to set, hundreds of extras charged up the hill dressed as Roman soldiers, while hundreds more charged down dressed as slaves. It took fifteen minutes to play out the entire scene. When it was done, DeMille was thoroughly pleased by what he had seen. He waved to his camera crew supervisor to confirm everything had been captured. The camera crew supervisor waved back and yelled, “Ready when you are, C.B!” thinking they had just gone through another rehearsal. Then the sun went down.

Listening and communicating is critical. And the most valuable tool available for this is your ability to ask questions, such as, “Is this another rehearsal?”

Today’s challenge: Examine experiences in your own personal and professional life in which a lack of communication either helped or hurt you and think of what you specifically learned from those experiences.