The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

I can’t believe we have the technology that allows me to get swept up in a different world while I’m 30,000 feet in the air.  Movies on airplanes … what a thing!

Of course, most of the time, the movies are so bad that I want to get up and walk out — but I can’t … because like I already told you, I’m 30,000 feet in the air.

Luckily, this was not the case on my recent trip back from Copenhagen. I saw a great movie called "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel". What a great film. It had a terrific cast of seasoned actors, and it even had a Dame in it. (Dame Judy Dench).

Dev Patel, one of the young actors, said something in the film that struck me as very profound and worthy of thought.

“Everything will be alright in the end. If things are not alright, it is not the end.”  

Wow. Let that blow your mind for a few minutes.

I dug a little deeper and discovered this was a Rudyard Kipling quote. (Dude! Someone tell Rudy that Dev is lifting his material!)

At any rate, there are two ways to look at this profoundly optimistic view of the universe:

    You can actively seek that “alright end”; or

    You may choose to passively participate in the anticipated possible future.

Some people think that if you just wait long enough, things will work out. If you just sit back and wait, hopefully money will come to you. Hopefully happiness will come to you and the secrets of life will simply fall into your lap. Hopefully.

Wandering around aimlessly in life may work for some. In my experience, however, it works that way for very few of us. Anticipating a specific set of goals and knowing why those goals are important is probably the most important first step you can make.

But understand that the course you set toward that goal may not always turn in the direction you expect. Be flexible. That unexpected direction may be fantastically positive. Remember that everything will be alright.

It is those times when we trend toward the negative that separates the winners from everyone else. Consider yourself a winner when an unexpected negative result appears. Assess where you are NOW. You are alive. You are breathing. Come to your senses and ADJUST! You thrive with what life throws at you. You already know the end result. Everything will be A-OK. Move again towards your goal and modify your actions as the situation dictates.

You’re a sailor sailing the seas of your life. Sailors zig and zag to their final destination. Mid-course corrections and interim plans are part of the path of business and life. We are here to LIVE.  

Those who are active planners have a vision. If, during the course of the journey towards that plan, things are not alright, then you are NOT at the end.  

You see, in the end, things will be alright.

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What Is Trust?

Over the weekend, I read a book that, in part, deals with the question: What is trust? And as I read the book, I was reminded of an article I read months ago about Chelsea Clinton’s wedding.

Chelsea had her wedding at the historic Astor Courts in Rhinebeck, NY. The article I read revealed that Chelsea used the house across the street from Astor Courts as a staging area. The newsperson that penned the article wrote, “There’s an awful lot of trust amongst the Clintons that the neighbors won’t talk about the wedding.”

That struck me. The Clinton’s went to a stranger for a favor and TRUSTED that they would be discreet. What kind of people would ever trust a complete stranger? The Clintons, that’s who.

The book I’m reading (The Rational Optimist:How Prosperity Evolves by Matt Ridley) talks about the fact that for human beings to excel and surpass other animals, we had to learn to trust.

I don’t want to get into a debate about evolution here, so let’s ignore apes entirely and say that we evolved from cavemen to the superior species we are today. We had to learn how to trust. The group of us who became what we are today actually started to trade, which is something that other animals do not do. Maybe these evolved cavemen would trade a banana for a stool. To make this trade, they had to trust their fellow caveman.

This concept of trust sets us apart.  

Now, or course, when you trade, you don’t always get something of equal value. But what it does require is an exchange where both parties are receiving something that is of more value than what they are giving. Let’s say, for instance, that you have blisters on your feet that hurt so bad you’d give anything for a stool. Let’s also say that I haven’t had a meal in days and am a skeleton of a man, so I’d give anything for a banana. I have a stool; you have a banana. It’s a win-win because we both want what the other has more than what we have.

So what is trust?

Trust is the belief that another person’s word is good. It’s the belief that I will, indeed, give you my stool when you hand over your banana. It’s the believe that when you give me your banana, I won’t turn around and say, “Hah! Sucker. Now I have your banana. Whatcha gonna do about it?”

Remember the movie Wall Street? Michael Douglas plays a famous character in cinematic history named Gordon Gecko. Gecko is right up there with Travis Bickle, Batman, and, of course, Ms. Piggy. Gecko is famous for giving some advice to college students: “Greed is good.”

But Gecko misses an important point. He assumes that there are winners and there are losers. He goes by the theory of zero-sum game. You are winning of others lose. You are losing if others win.

But that’s not what happens in real life. There are some zero-sum games, sure, but the reality of human society is that greed is good, but it’s never a zero sum game. We are giving something and we are getting something.

This relates to all of us. When we provide a service for a client, we are giving value. It may not even be material value. It might even be a feeling that we give people. (I usually give people the feeling of happiness … or the willies).

Maybe we fix their car or file their tax returns and, in exchange, we get paid and—if we do a good job—perhaps a kind word.

If you treat your clients like they are in a zero-sum game with you, you will eventually go out of business. But if you both trust each other, and if you work hard to make sure you earn trust by providing something your client truly values, your clients will always turn to you to provide value.

Today’s challenge: Consider the answer to the question: What is trust? Be impeccable with your word in your dealings with everyone today.

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